Grandmother Has Hard Time Grasping Youth Culture

hip grandmaCharlottesville, Virginia — Martha Tuft considers herself a cool grandmother. At age 73, Tuft loves to garden, play with her dog, and of course, drink her scotch. However, according to her grandson, Ethan Tuft, Martha has been having a hard time keeping up with internet linguistics and abbreviations. According to Ethan, her actions have been rather embarrassing for her grandson.

“I consider myself a hip grandmother,” said Martha Tuft. “I do Facebook, I do the Twitter, and I text. I’m definitely a cool grandmother.”

Ethan Tuft, the 17-year-old grandson of Martha Tuft, said that his grandma is “pretty cool,” but would like her to stay off of social media, or at least try to stop embracing youth culture.

“Memaw? Yeah, she’s cool. I just wish she would stop trying to act like a teenager. She just gets confused easily. She wrote on my wall after my dog died, ‘Sorry about your dog, he was a great pet. LOL.’ I initially thought, ‘wow Memaw is kind of a dick.’ It wasn’t until later that I realized that she thought ‘lol’ meant ‘lots of love.'”

Ethan said sometimes his grandmothers lack of knowledge about youth culture has gotten her in trouble.

“The last time Memaw tweeted was right before we got on a plane for a family vacation. While we were boarding, she asked if I saw her latest ‘pound sign’ (hashtag) saying it was hilarious. As she was putting her luggage in the overhead bin she said, ‘your grandma’s got a bomb, Ethan! Your grandma’s got a bomb!’ She obviously meant to say that she was ‘the bomb,’ but that led to us being detained for four hours and missing our flight.”

Martha Tuft said that while her mistake was embarrassing, it hasn’t persuaded her from trying to stay “hip.”

“Was that an embarrassing moment? Like that black man who writes poetry to music would say, ‘Yeah!’ But it just means I have to try that much harder to get on the level of my grandkids.”